I generally dislike the word immature. Not when used in a scientific sense or to describe a stage of development. But in normal conversation, I find few words more grating.
The problem is that the word immature has a number of definitions and connotations that come with each. Oxford identifies two definitions:
- Not fully developed. (neutral connotation)
- Having or showing an emotional or intellectual development appropriate to someone younger. (negative connotation)
Mariam-Webster rephrases the second definition as:
- exhibiting less than an expected degree of maturity
This definition begins to embody the issue I generally have with the word. Circular definitions are definitionally terrible, but what is meant by the word maturity in the Mariam-Webster definition? Fully developed, or a desired end state?
Generally when I hear that someone is “immature,” I take it to mean that they don’t handle responsibility well, lack judgement, or love sophomoric humor. At worst, I may think the person being described, is just not a good person.
Bojack Horseman continually hurts those around him with narcissistic actions of self-loathing; is he immature? When a 70-year-old man makes an inappropriate joke is it a sign of immaturity? In both examples the person obviously completed maturation through adulthood. It is exceedingly unlikely that additional development as a part of the aging process will lead to positive character development.
Using the word immature to describe bad behavior leads to two harms:
- It removes agency from bad actors. “Oh, he’s just immature”–No, he is probably a jerk and time won’t change that.
- It imparts a negative connotation to a helpful descriptor, especially for children through young adults.
Immaturity is not necessary bad. A 70 year old with an adaptable mind that tries to learn new schools of thought might be immature. A 13 year old that is struggling to keep up with classmates physically and emotionally is immature.
Similarly the word “mature” has been bastardized with a positive connotation when describing people. I won’t spend time reviewing this, because the harms aren’t as bad. But, I feel bad for children that are trying to be “mature” because adults tell them it is something to strive for.
For my part, I hope to mature at a normal rate until I am middle aged and spend my latter years in immaturity.
Polly Wanna Math 